The Man Who Died On Holy Innocents' Day
: The Swedish Fairy BookOnce upon a time there was a man named Kalle Kula. He was a wild
fellow, and had committed many a grievous crime during his life. When
he came to die, and his wife took up the Bible to pray for him as he
was lying there, he said, "No, this is Holy Innocents' Day, and it is
not worth while reading from the Bible for me. You had better go into
the kitchen instead, and bake waffles. I shall die this very day, and
then you
into the kitchen and baked the waffles; but when she came back to him
again he was dead. So Kalle Kula was laid in the coffin with a bundle
of waffles beside him.
Then he came to the gates of Paradise with his little bundle of
waffles under his arm and knocked. But St. Peter said to him: "You
have no business here, with all the crimes you have committed." "Yes,
that may well be so, but I died on Holy Innocents' Day," said Kalle
Kula, "so at least I may look in and see the innocent children?" St.
Peter could not refuse him, and opened the door a little way. Kalle
Kula took advantage of the moment and cried: "Come, you little holy
innocents, you shall have waffles!" And as they had not been given any
waffles in Paradise, they all came rushing up, so that the door flew
wide open, and then Kalle Kula crept in.
But St. Peter went to our Lord, told him what had happened, and asked
what was to be done. "The best thing is to let your lawyer attend to
it," said our Lord, "because lawyers usually know all about evicting
people." St. Peter searched everywhere, but could not find a lawyer.
Then he went back to our Lord and reported to him that it was
impossible to find a single lawyer in all Paradise, and Kalle Kula was
allowed to remain where he was.
If you tie a thief and a miller and a lawyer together and roll the
whole bundle down a hill--no matter how you roll it--you can always be
sure that whoever is on top is a thief.
NOTE
This story, part fairy-tale, part legend, "The Man Who Died on
Holy Innocents' Day" (communicated by Dr. v. Sydow-Lund) has a
Danish variant. Its innocently malicious humor is worthy of
Gottfried Keller.
More
-
The Lizards
A Naturalist, cruel as a Turk, Two Lizards in his garden catches, And coolly sets himself at work To anatomize the little wretches. The plumpest now he has dissected, And torn the reptile limb from limb; With microscope he ... The Lochmaben Harper
"Oh, heard ye of a silly harper, Wha lang lived in Lochmaben town, How he did gang to fair England, To steal King Henry's wanton brown?" Once upon a time, there was an old man in Lochmaben, who made his livelihood by going ... The Lost Half-hour
Once upon a time there was an old widow woman who had three sons: the first two were clever enough, but the third, Bobo by name, was little better than a silly simpleton. All his mother's scoldings and beatings--and she smacked the poor lad soundly ... The Lost Money
BY BOLTON HALL Doris's papa gave her a five-dollar bill, such a lot of money! Doris went to a big bank and asked if they could give her smaller money for it. The banker said he thought they could. So he gave her two two-dollar bills and a big sil... The Loveliest Rose In The World
BY HANS CHRISTIAN ANDERSEN (ADAPTED) Once there reigned a queen, in whose garden were found the most glorious flowers at all seasons and from all the lands of the world. But more than all others she loved the roses, and she had many kinds of this ... The Loving Pair
A WHIPPING Top and a Ball lay close together in a drawer among other playthings. One day the Top said to the Ball, "Since we are living so much together, why should we not be lovers?" But the Ball, being made of morocco leather, thought herself ... The Lute Player
Once upon a time there was a king and queen who lived happily and comfortably together. They were very fond of each other and had nothing to worry them, but at last the king grew restless. He longed to go out into the world, to try his strength in... The Macaw And The Marmot
A brilliantly-colored Macaw, A wandering clown, near the spot Where she hung in a balcony, saw-- A Savoyard, more likely than not. He was showing--a penny to gain-- An animal ugly and squat; Which he lauded in high-... The Mad Goose And The Tiger Forest
Hu-lin was a little slave girl. She had been sold by her father when she was scarcely more than a baby, and had lived for five years with a number of other children in a wretched houseboat. Her cruel master treated her very badly. He made her g... The Magic Bon Bons
There lived in Boston a wise and ancient chemist by the name of Dr. Daws, who dabbled somewhat in magic. There also lived in Boston a young lady by the name of Claribel Sudds, who was possessed of much money, little wit and an intense desire to go... The Magic Book
There was once an old couple named Peder and Kirsten who had an only son called Hans. From the time he was a little boy he had been told that on his sixteenth birthday he must go out into the world and serve his apprenticeship. So, one fine... The Magic Kettle
Right in the middle of Japan, high up among the mountains, an old man lived in his little house. He was very proud of it, and never tired of admiring the whiteness of his straw mats, and the pretty papered walls, which in warm weather always slid ba... The Magic Mirror
From the Senna A long, long while ago, before ever the White Men were seen in Senna, there lived a man called Gopani-Kufa. One day, as he was out hunting, he came upon a strange sight. An enormous python had caught an antelope and coiled i... The Magic Of The Mermaids
When Trot and Cap'n Bill entered the Rose Chamber they found the two mermaids reclining before an air fountain that was sending thousands of tiny bubbles up through the water. "These fountains of air are excellent things," remarked Queen Aquare... The Magic Palace
Ibrahim, the most learned and pious man of the city, whom everybody held in esteem, fell on troubled days. To none did he speak of his sufferings, for he was proud and would have been compelled to refuse the help which he knew would have been offe... The Magic Ring
Once upon a time there lived an old couple who had one son called Martin. Now when the old man's time had come, he stretched himself out on his bed and died. Though all his life long he had toiled and moiled, he only left his widow and son two hun... The Magic Swan
There were once upon a time three brothers, of whom the eldest was called Jacob, the second Frederick, and the youngest Peter. This youngest brother was made a regular butt of by the other two, and they treated him shamefully. If anything went w... The Magic Tears
There was once a king named Theophile who lived in a dim castle on the edge of the ocean, but so far above the water that the flying spray never reached its lowest terrace; and only the strongest-winged seagulls could circle its towers and turrets... The Magician And His Pupil
From the German of A. Godin. THERE was once a poor shoemaker renowned far and wide as a drunkard. He had a good wife and many daughters, but only one son. As soon as this son was old enough his mother dressed him in his best clothes, combed his... The Magician's Horse
Once upon a time, there was a king who had three sons. Now it happened that one day the three princes went out hunting in a large forest at some distance from their father's palace, and the youngest prince lost his way, so his brothers had to re... The Magnet
I. In olden days there was a shepherd whose name was Magnes. Magnes lost a sheep. He went to the mountains to find it. He came to a place where there were barren rocks. He walked over these rocks, and felt that his boots were sticking to them. ... The Magpie's Nest
BY JOSEPH JACOBS All the birds of the air came to the magpie and asked her to teach them how to build nests. For the magpie is the cleverest bird of all at building nests. So she put all the birds round her and began to show them how to do it. Fi... The Maiden And The Frog
[This tale of the frog-lover is known in every part of Germany, and is alluded to by several old writers of that country. It is the tale "Der Froschkoenig, oder der Eiserne Heinrich," in Grimm. "These enchanted frogs," says Sir W. Scott, "have migra... The Maiden Of Unai
The Maiden of Unai was fair as an earthly deity, but the eyes of man might not behold her. She dwelt in a hidden place in her father's house, and of what cheer she made the live-long day not a soul could tell, but her father who kept watch, and he... The Maiden With The Wooden Helmet
In a little village in the country of Japan there lived long, long ago a man and his wife. For many years they were happy and prosperous, but bad times came, and at last nothing was left them but their daughter, who was as beautiful as the morning.... The Mail-coach Passengers
BY HANS CHRISTIAN ANDERSEN (ADAPTED) It was bitterly cold. The sky glittered with stars, and not a breeze stirred. "Bump,"--an old pot was thrown at a neighbor's door; and, "Bang! Bang!" went the guns, for they were greeting the New Year. It wa... The Mallet
There were once two farmer men who were brothers. Both of them worked hard in seed-time and in harvest-time. They stood knee-deep in water to plant out the young rice, bending their backs a thousand times an hour; they wielded the sickle when the ... The Man and His Two Sweethearts
A MIDDLE-AGED MAN, whose hair had begun to turn gray, courted two women at the same time. One of them was young, and the other well advanced in years. The elder woman, ashamed to be courted by a man younger than herself, made a point, whenever her... The Man and His Wife
A MAN had a Wife who made herself hated by all the members of his household. Wishing to find out if she had the same effect on the persons in her father's house, he made some excuse to send her home on a visit to her father. After a short time she... The Man and the Lion
A MAN and a Lion traveled together through the forest. They soon began to boast of their respective superiority to each other in strength and prowess. As they were disputing, they passed a statue carved in stone, which represented "a Lion strangle... The Man and the Satyr
A MAN and a Satyr once drank together in token of a bond of alliance being formed between them. One very cold wintry day, as they talked, the Man put his fingers to his mouth and blew on them. When the Satyr asked the reason for this, he told him ... The Man Bitten by a Dog
A MAN who had been bitten by a Dog went about in quest of someone who might heal him. A friend, meeting him and learning what he wanted, said, "If you would be cured, take a piece of bread, and dip it in the blood from your wound, and go and give i... The Man In The Moon
The Man in the Moon Sups his sowins with a cutty-spoon. A Northumberland dish called sowins, is composed of the coarse parts of oatmeal, which are put into a tub, and covered with water, and then allowed to stand till it turns sour. A... The Man Who Died On Holy Innocents' Day
Once upon a time there was a man named Kalle Kula. He was a wild fellow, and had committed many a grievous crime during his life. When he came to die, and his wife took up the Bible to pray for him as he was lying there, he said, "No, this is Holy... The Man Who Never Knew Fear
TRANSLATED FROM THE GAELIC BY DOUGLAS HYDE There was once a lady, and she had two sons whose names were Louras (Lawrence) and Carrol. From the day that Lawrence was born nothing ever made him afraid, but Carrol would never go outside the door fr... The Man Who Would Not Scold
Old Wang lived in a village near Nanking. He cared for nothing in the world but to eat good food and plenty of it. Now, though this Wang was by no means a poor man, it made him very sad to spend money, and so people called him in sport, the Mis... The Man Without A Heart
Once upon a time there were seven brothers, who were orphans, and had no sister. Therefore they were obliged to do all their own housework. This they did not like at all; so after much deliberation they decided to get married. There were, unfortun... The Man, the Horse, the Ox, and the Dog
A HORSE, Ox, and Dog, driven to great straits by the cold, sought shelter and protection from Man. He received them kindly, lighted a fire, and warmed them. He let the Horse make free with his oats, gave the Ox an abundance of hay, and fed the Dog... The Mandarin And The Butterfly
A mandarin once lived in Kiang-ho who was so exceedingly cross and disagreeable that everyone hated him. He snarled and stormed at every person he met and was never known to laugh or be merry under any circumstances. Especially he hated boys and g... The Manslayer
A MAN committed a murder, and was pursued by the relations of the man whom he murdered. On his reaching the river Nile he saw a Lion on its bank and being fearfully afraid, climbed up a tree. He found a serpent in the upper branches of the tree, an... The Marvellous Musician
THERE was once upon a time a marvellous musician. One day he was wandering through a wood all by himself, thinking now of one thing, now of another, till there was nothing else left to think about. Then he said to himself: `Time hangs very heavil... The Marvelous Dog And The Wonderful Cat
[Illustration: Background, books scattered on library shelves. Foreground, a white dog with glasses and a black cat seated at a low table, studying books and making notes.] Once upon a time there was an old enchanter who taught magic and enchan... The Master and His Dogs
A CERTAIN MAN, detained by a storm in his country house, first of all killed his sheep, and then his goats, for the maintenance of his household. The storm still continuing, he was obliged to slaughter his yoke oxen for food. On seeing this, his D... The Master Cat Or Puss In Boots
There was a miller who left no more estate to the three sons he had than his mill, his ass, and his cat. The partition was soon made. Neither scrivener nor attorney was sent for. They would soon have eaten up all the poor patrimony. The eldest ha... The Master Mariner
Once upon a time a fine young fisherman rose early in the morning, and sailed alone to the fishing-grounds. There was very little wind, and beneath the speckled clouds and the cold, pearly light of the late dawn, the broad, low billows went slowly a... The Master Of The Harvest
BY MRS. ALFRED GATTY (ADAPTED) The Master of the Harvest walked by the side of his cornfields in the springtime. A frown was on his face, for there had been no rain for several weeks, and the earth was hard from the parching of the east winds. Th... The Master Thief
There was once a farmer who had a son named Will, and he sent him out in the world to learn a trade and seek his fortune. Now he hadn't gone far when he was stopped by a band of robbers who called out to him: "Your purse or your life!" And he... The Master Thief
THERE was once upon a time a husbandman who had three sons. He had no property to bequeath to them, and no means of putting them in the way of getting a living, and did not know what to do, so he said that they had his leave to take to anything they... The Master-maid
There was once a king and a queen and they had a bonny boy whom they loved beyond anything. Now when he was grown up into a fine young prince, the King, his father, went a-hunting one day and lost his way in the forest, and when he came through it... The Master-maid
Once upon a time there was a king who had many sons. I do not exactly know how many there were, but the youngest of them could not stay quietly at home, and was determined to go out into the world and try his luck, and after a long time the King ... The Master-maid
Once there was a King who had a son, and this Prince would not stay at home, but went a long, long way off to a very far country. There he met a Giant; and though it seems a strange thing for a King's son to do, the Prince went to the Giant's hous... The Matsuyama Mirror
A long, long time ago there lived in a quiet spot a young man and his wife. They had one child, a little daughter, whom they both loved with all their hearts. I cannot tell you their names, for they have long since been forgotten; but the name ... The Mecha-meck
<p>That fearful time when the forest fire set all the Brownies busy burying their food and dishes at the feast-hall, you remember it took six of them to carry and hide the Mecha-meck. For it is a large fat white root as big as a baby, and sometimes i... The Medicine In The Sky
<p>This is one of the greatest and best secrets of Woodcraft—The Medicine in the Sky.</p> <p>Let me tell you a story about it. There was once an Indian who left his own people, to live with the white man, in the East. But the Great Spirit was d... The Mermaid And The Boy
Long, long ago, there lived a king who ruled over a country by the sea. When he had been married about a year, some of his subjects, inhabiting a distant group of islands, revolted against his laws, and it became needful for him to leave his wif... The Mermaids
The next morning, as soon as Trot had helped wipe the breakfast dishes and put them away in the cupboard, the little girl and Cap'n Bill started out toward the bluff. The air was soft and warm and the sun turned the edges of the waves into sparkli... The Merry Cobbler And His Coat
Spare, the merry cobbler, of whom we read in the last story, was treated like a prince at the King's court; and the news of his good fortune reached his brother Scrub in the moorland cottage one first of April, when the cuckoo came again with two ... The Merry Wives
From the Danish There lay three houses in a row, in one of which there lived a tailor, in another a carpenter, and in the third a smith. All three were married, and their wives were very good friends. They often talked about how stupid their hu... The Messenger
Here in the morning we're starting so soon, Give us a message, we'll ride to the moon, Straight through the meadows and hop o'er the stile, And we will but charge you a farthing a mile. A farthing a mile! a farthing a mile!... The Metal King
A GERMAN FOLE-TALE (ADAPTED) Once long ago there was a high mountain whose rocks were veined with gold and silver and seamed with iron. At times, from a huge rent in the mountain-side, there shot out roaring, red flames, and clouds of black sm... The Metal Pig
IN THE city of Florence, not far from the Piazza del Granduca, runs a little cross street called Porta Rosa. In this street, just in front of the market place where vegetables are sold, stands a pig, made of brass and curiously formed. The color h... The Mice and the Weasels
THE WEASELS and the Mice waged a perpetual war with each other, in which much blood was shed. The Weasels were always the victors. The Mice thought that the cause of their frequent defeats was that they had no leaders set apart from the general a... The Mice in Council
THE MICE summoned a council to decide how they might best devise means of warning themselves of the approach of their great enemy the Cat. Among the many plans suggested, the one that found most favor was the proposal to tie a bell to the neck of t... The Mid-day Rock
FROM THE FRENCH of J. JARRY. ONCE upon a time there was a poor man, who lived somewhere in the middle of the woods near a place called Gatines de Treigny. Everybody called him Father Rameau. Not that he had any children--he had not even ever be... The Milk-white Doo
There was once a man who got his living by working in the fields. He had one little son, called Curly-Locks, and one little daughter, called Golden-Tresses; but his wife was dead, and, as he had to be out all day, these children were often left al... The Milk-Woman and Her Pail
A FARMER'S daughter was carrying her Pail of milk from the field to the farmhouse, when she fell a-musing. "The money for which this milk will be sold, will buy at least three hundred eggs. The eggs, allowing for all mishaps, will produce two hundr...